A Rude April Surprise

Or What March Showers Bring

When the record rainfall of March gave way to April sunshine, I addressed my garden chores with enthusiasm.  It felt good to be outdoors in the warmth and I was pulling weeds with reckless abandon---I had weeds for days but the clock was ticking on the sunshine and I wanted to sneak in a little car washing while the weather was fine. So while I knew I couldn’t get ALL the weeding done---right, like weeding is ever “done”---I figured I had enough of the weeding done around my delphiniums that adding a little chicken poop to discourage the greedy elk wouldn’t hurt.

Much to my surprise, I ran out of delphiniums before I ran out of chicken poop. Upon closer inspection I could see that where some of my delphiniums where supposed to have been there were only ragged little nubs, browning at the ends. Not the work of elk but of that other garden pest, the ones WITHOUT feet: SLUGS.

Clearly, while the heavy rains had been keeping me hostage INSIDE, the ravenous mollusks had been helping themselves to my hapless plants OUTSIDE. The wet conditions only encouraged them, the deluge aiding and abetting their slimy assault. I hadn’t ventured out of my house except for brief dashes to and from the car, my poor flower beds had been left unguarded, and my lovely---and apparently delicious--delphiniums vulnerable to their voracious jaws. (Yes. For the purposes of this narrative, slugs have jaws. Adjust your visual accordingly.) 

Of course, the warm temperatures that had drawn me out of the shelter of my house had also driven the slugs to seek shelter in their secret lairs, nary a one to be seen.

More’s the pity too, because I now have a jug of salty brine just waiting for the little buggers.