No No No NO

sNOw

No. No. No. No. No thank you.

Day one: hand shoveled.

Enough already. STOP. It started to snow and forgot to stop...so much snow, in the worst of all possible locations: my driveway. It all started, as it often does, with just a little bit of light, easily shoveled snow. Snow that is all pristine and picturesque. It started to snow, and I started to shovel. I shoveled far, and wide, opening up lots of room so that when the bigger accumulations came I wouldn’t be hemmed in by snowbanks that were too high to throw the new snow over.

I got out candles, stockpiled water and batteries. Because this is not my first SnowRodeo. I’ve got this. I know what I’m doing. That was Day One. 

Sue-Gyver, the better to read by.

On Day Two, I re-shoveled in front of my garage...and the trickiest, curvy-hilly part of my driveway—the part I always slide off of, the part where I am often pulled out of after getting stuck-- and shoveled the opening at the end of the drive that the snowplow always closes. And then I shoveled out the mailboxes. Then I shoveled out the opening of a couple of neighbors’ driveways. And the door to my pump house.

The snow on Day Two was not as light. It was also significantly deeper than Day One. It continued to snow as I shoveled. The remaining length of my driveway seemed to grow longer. I ceased shoveling. I went inside and googled “snow-blowers for sale near you.” Alas, there were none in my zip-code.

Branch down!

On Day Three I decided that it was high time I introduced myself to my newest neighbors---neighbors that had the good sense to move into the ‘hood with a beautiful tractor equipped both scoop and blade. As luck would have it, John and Linda are lovely people and agreed to come dig me out. They helped me remove the tree limbs also blocking my driveway. And we commiserated our mutual lack of electricity—BECAUSE OH YES, THE POWER HAS BEEN OUT FOR OVER 24 HOURS, WHAT DO YOU MEAN I SHOULD CALM DOWN, NOW I HAVE NO CELL SIGNAL, WE ARE ALL GOING TO DIE.

Spoiler alert: We didn’t die, the power came back on at 4 a.m. the following morning. Every day since, I have chipped away at the remaining snow, trying to clear it back to the original, Day One width. 

Because the forecast? It has sNOw in it...