Shopping for wedding dresses is a lot of fun. At least it is as the Mother of the Groom. My job is to sip champagne and admire the beauty of my son’s Beloved.
This is not a hard job, because champagne is delightful and all my sons’ beloveds are as well. I would just like to point out here that if I had mis-punctuated the following plural possessive---instead of being inclusive of all of my daughters-in-law, I would have been leading you to believe that you were about to get a heads-up on the next season of The Bachelor Meets The Real Housewives of the ELC, Super Hair-Pulling Edition. Thankfully, this is not the case. Punctuation is important. Please use it responsibly.
Mother-of-the-Groom (MOG) is a mostly ceremonial position. MOG advice on the internet usually boils down to “wear beige and keep your mouth shut.” That is excellent advice, probably, but I usually wear blue and make jokes. So far, it’s worked out for me. Perhaps because my sons have done such a lovely job of picking women of grace and tolerance, perhaps because my jokes are really funny. It’s likely both.
Shopping for my MOG dress is fun but includes less bubbly. I’m not sure why this is so. I will ask the MOBs if this has also been their experience. Perhaps we will start a petition to get this to change.
As MOG, my negotiated contribution to the wedding of the happy couple is to provide both the florals and the very talented—and highly susceptible to blackmail—floral designer. All I’m going to say about that is there was a very good reason why I keep all those notes back in high school. So far, they’ve saved me about $6k. Minus the fireproof safety deposit box fee, of course.
I also provide the libations on the Happy Occasion, so I feel that I have contributed to the happiness of all. That fact that I can also add to the contents of my safety deposit box is purely serendipitous, I assure you.
 |
| Please enjoy these gratuitous wedding pictures Circa 1986 Sue & Shane |
 |
No comments:
Post a Comment