Friday, March 20, 2020

Virtual Real Life

By now, even the most blissfully oblivious among us have noticed that “normal” is a bit different than “business as usual.”
There are all kinds of advice and information—even mis-information-- available on public safety, proper hand washing, social distancing. Hopefully you’ve paid attention to the Very Fine Advice available, but if you haven’t, here’s the cheat sheet: 1) You can have the virus and share it BEFORE you have any symptoms. SO-- just because y’all are feeling find doesn’t mean you still can’t infect grandma. And since I’ve officially become a grandma, I TAKE THIS PERSONALLY.
2) Wash your hands often, for at LEAST 20 seconds, WITH SOAP (your mom was right about that) and turn off the water with a paper towel if possible. Disinfect surfaces often AND STOP LICKING DOOR HANDLES, I SEE YOU, INTERNET. For the rest of you, stop touching your face.
3) To social distance: just pretend you’re better than everyone else and space accordingly. Just kidding--but do keep 6-10 feet apart in public. That means new line etiquette, don’t get in your cashier’s face when paying/ordering, and you can go to Disneyland when this is all over, but not now. STAY HOME. Yes, you can go for a walk in the woods, but stay 6-10 feet away from bears. Or other hikers, whatever. Google “flatten the curve” and see why it’s so important we do this NOW. As an aside, I can only hope someone hasn’t turned #Flatten the Curve into one of those risqué sites...
If you can afford to, consider keeping your appointments with small business owners, but keep them “virtually”. Order your coffee, pick it up and then chat with your buddies via FaceTIme. Personally, I’m “keeping” my appointments (paying for them) but not going “in office” to get them. I can help keep my local economy going, I can keep myself and my neighbors safe. I know not everyone can do this—but if you can, please consider it. I promised my hairdresser I wouldn’t cut my own bangs in the meantime, so I believe she’s on board with my plan.
4) Take care of your immune system. Laughter is good medicine, so here’s my recent favorite, regarding toilet paper hoarding: “Back in my day, there was so much TP, people used to literally string it up in the trees of their enemies.

 Eat your veggies, drink plenty of water and get plenty of sleep. Mom was right again!
 Check in with your neighbors, Senior Citizens, and friends. We all need connection, even as we “distance.” Thinking about others takes your mind of your own worries. 
We truly are all in this together. Six feet apart.

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